“Christian” or “Not”
I’m Swedish-Canadian. As such, my national heroes are often unsung, and I have been trained to see them among the throngs of the more visible popular favourites. In fact, when I learn a new word or concept, hear about new research or technology, read a new writer, or hear new music I automatically categorize it as “Swedish” or “not Swedish”, and as “Canadian” or “not Canadian”. This is the flavour of my existence. My life is a place where I map sometimes overlapping binary values for things onto my understanding of the world. And frankly, I find it funny. I like knowing that the zipper on my jeans was invented by a Swede, and that it’s possible to have a fantasy hockey pool made entirely out of Swedish players (my plan for next season). I like knowing that my favourite lyricist hails from Winnipeg and used to work in the same building as my cousin. However, I know that I’m not the only person who thinks in two columns with little plus and minus signs in them. More and more lately I’ve been noticing the underlying assumption of “Christian” versus “not Christian” that pervades my social circle, and the qualities associated with each of these categories.
Why do we separate the world into “Christian” and “not Christian”? I can see the theoretical point: Christians have the Holy Spirit to guide them, and are being refined and made more Christ-like. Following from this, Christian things should have something about them that’s different, and better. Christian books, Christian music, Christian parties, Christian people - all of these should have the markings of someone’s relationship with Christ on them.
I take exception to the format that this thinking seems to have taken. From the way I’ve heard it used, it seems that to many people “Christian” simply means “good”, and “not Christian” simply means “bad”. What is it about “Christian” that is inherently good? God is good. Christians are just people living with a heavenly Friend. And what is it about “not Christian” that is inherently bad? Seeing as I have non-religious friends who inspire me to be better, and who floor me with the quality of their lives, I have to say that in many cases the only difference between “Christian” and “not Christian” that I notice is the name.
I once told my friend about a quality guy I had just met. Her first response was, “yeah, but does he like JC?” To her, the “Christian” “not Christian” dichotomy was the most important thing. I don’t fault her for asking, knowing that she wanted me to make a safe and wise decision about my relationship with him. But it got me to thinking that if he had been a total asshole, but met the “Christian” requirement, I probably would have had her unquestioning blessing.
Luckily for my inability to meet guys that I am “allowed” to date, I like being alone, or in small groups. I’ve never been a big party girl, and sometimes I realize that a group is the last place that I want to be. Not too long ago I received an invitation to a party, but I wasn’t feeling it. My friend tried to convince me to come with two ill-fated arguments. At first she told me that it was a Christian party, which meant it would be good. Having been to some excruciating Christian parties in my day, I continued to refuse. She redoubled her attack with the assertion that, seeing as I was single, it would be a great place to meet Christian guys. She had unwittingly dealt the coup de grâce to her own cause. There was no chance that I would go to the only meat market worse than the bar - a Christian mixer.
The biggest differences between the Christian mixers I’ve been to and the bar lie in the music choices, beverage alcohol content, lighting, and closing time. Otherwise, they’re both just places for eligible singles to meet other unattacheds and see where things go. Think back to youth group, when the new guy would show up and all the girls would make sure that he felt right at home. There was always that one girl who would date the new guy into the community, and then break it off once he had established a lasting friendship with his small group. Here we have two very similar situations with very similar goals. The bar is a little more open with the meat market label, but other than the demon liquor, which I will allow to be a dicey one to get too involved with, where is the clear-cut line between “good” and “bad”? And how is it that I’ve heard of so many good marriages on the “not Christian” side of the divide that started at the bar, and so many disastrous, even abusive ones on the “Christian” side that started at church? Could it be that we cast off men and women of good character because they are not Christians, and mask the serious character flaws of others with the catch-all “good” label of “Christian”?
Apparently, “Christian” and “not Christian” designations have become an easy way to make choices with very little thought. Thinking (or not thinking) like this is dangerous. When is it ever okay to stop thinking for yourself, and thinking on your feet? It also negatively affects the quality of everyday experiences - take for instance the blind acceptance of Christian music as “good” and secular music as “bad”. I will accede that there is some incredible Christian music in the world, and some horrific secular music, but I have a hard time accepting that a lot of schlocky Christian radio pop songs are good when they are full of identical rhymes and retch-worthy lyrics. On the other hand, I refuse to stop listening to The Weakerthans - I know of no other band that saturates entire albums with such honest, jaw-dropping, Canadian, non-Christian metaphor.
Posted on August 13, 2007 12:00 AM
Comments
Great article. Rob Bell touched on this topic in "Velvet Elvis." I understand that Christians all too often dismiss things and people for being nonChristian and likewise nonChristians dismiss things with the Christian label, and that we need to break down these disparate, stereotypical thoughts in order to build up understanding and acceptance and love, but I wonder a) how we can do that when people cling so tightly to black-or-white, conformist ideologies and b) how do we answer to life's incongruencies?
Posted by: Stephanie Nikolopoulos | August 13, 2007 3:19 PM
You are definitely on to something here... keep working through it. I have spent the last 10 years trudging through this puzzle and just now am starting to feel like I am on the other side...
My wife and I attended the Festival of Faith and Music at Calvin College and this idea of what is and isn't Christian (and whatever the heck that means in the first place) was the main topic dialogued through the weekend.
However, I would drop a line of caution... When it comes to art and music and thought and wisdom, Truth can be found all around you and from the most unexpected of sources (i.e. Acts 17). And I agree with Stephanie's ideas from Rob Bell that we as Christians need to reconsider how we view the people around us (Christian or not)...
But referring to an idea, or a song, or book, or philosophy as Christian (in that it illustrates and accurately represents the truth we know from scripture) is quite different than what the Bible tells us about people and how it defines them as Christian...
And the Bible gives very specific instruction when it comes to a marriage relationship in this regard...
Posted by: Troy DeShano | August 14, 2007 4:57 PM
yeah its a sad thing to view people as "us" and "them" we're all just people and its important to view each other as such....
"we're just two human beings...."
-american football
Posted by: Matthew Flores | August 14, 2007 9:33 PM
One thing I would point out in the whole dating thing is what the Bible says in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers." I didn't have to deal with this in by dating relationships (married at 21 to a girl I started dating at 18). Anyway, I did have to face this in a business decision about whether or not to purchase part of a practice with a guy who was not a believer. Our prioroities and ethics were completely incompatible. In my work with college student at church, I always caution them about even casually dating a non-believer because you never know where your "heart" will lead. That being said, I agree that just because a person says they are a christian, doesn't make them necessarily any better. I have from time to time had to look at my own life and ask myself, "what's different in how you live and how the non-christian next door who is fairly moral and ethical lives." Of course the answer is my relationship to Christ and my eternal destination.
Posted by: Patrick Sexton | August 15, 2007 8:06 PM
Thanks for all your thoughts, everyone - especially for your gentle spirits where you disagree or have a correction or caution to offer.
Regarding relationships, I think what I mean to highlight is the default acceptance of someone by their title rather than their character -- these are things I have myself encountered. I don't mean to instruct people to seek after close or intimate relationships with people of different faiths. I have seen those relationships work out beautifully (and if you're one of these, I respect you very much), but I also know many cases in which they are very difficult - even untenable. That situation I found myself in frustrated me, because I felt the label had to fit before the person himself was inquired after; this came at a time when I was learning to do the opposite.
Stephanie, I'd like to ask you what you mean by answering to life's incongruencies? It sounds like an interesting thought; if you have the time I'd love to hear you develop it.
As for black-and-white ideologies, I have come to no answer at present. I try to live my life following my convictions, and with honesty. I've wondered if my thoughts (and sometimes even outright dissent) could ever encourage someone else to engage with their faith in a dynamic way. I don't know if they do or not.
Troy -- I can't believe you saw Sufjan, Emmylou AND Neko ALL AT ONCE. Colour me one jealous Canadian. That looks like an incredible festival.
Posted by: Sara Johansson | August 15, 2007 10:39 PM
I have to tell you Sara, it was awesome. I try not to use cliche adjectives, but it truly was "life-changing"... i can't think of another way to describe it.
The lectures were really great... you should check out the podcast. They were also quite relevant to this discussion at hand. I did not know what to expect from Sufjan's lecture, you never know what to expect when a musician takes the podium... but it was one of the most profound collection of thoughts I had ever heard. (unfortunately they were not able to release this audio... i am on the hunt for some sort of bootleg transcript--as lame as that sounds!)
It is hard to explain, but the music itself was also quite challenging... Anathallo opened the weekend and if they had been opening for anyone but Sufjan they would have easily stole the show (they had already stolen my heart)... Their performance followed by Sufjan's was one of the defining moments of my entire life...
I'm afraid i'm getting off topic here, but that weekend really did shape how I perceive the world around me...
Send me an email if you want some direction as to what podcasts are worth listening.
Posted by: Troy DeShano | August 17, 2007 5:57 AM
Sounds great, Troy; but I can't find your email. (Clicking on your name takes me to your blog.)
Why don't you send me your email address to my old account -- sarajowins at yahoo.ca -- and then we can go from there?
Posted by: Sara Johansson | August 17, 2007 10:10 AM
Great article, Sara! I don't think there is enough out there on this topic. And on a completely geeky note, I love your British spellings of "favorite" and "color."
Posted by: Ashley | August 17, 2007 1:19 PM
This was such a wonderful article.
One question I kept asking myself thoughout my reading was, "what are we as Christians known by nowadays." (Is "nowadays" a word?)
I regret to say that in many circles it has slowly, but surely become not our acts of genuine love toward one another, but our bumper stickers, bracelets, word choices, and apparel. It's sad.
We were supposed to be light for a world blinded by sin and hate... but lights are not only intended to illuminate, they are supposed to be warm. And some of the brightest places in the Christian universe, are some of the coldest places on Earth.
The face of Christianity has been to a corporate make-up artist, while the heart has grown cold... lets listen to Jesus, stop waisting our money, and start loving eachother again.
Posted by: Ebenezer (it means something) | August 19, 2007 12:25 PM
If you were to look at the back of my crapy 80's diesel mercedes you'd see:
California plates.
Love wins (sticker from Mars Hill)
3 Bones Stickers (skeletons and Sk8 Stuff)
Patagonia sticker
3rd world surfboards sticker
If you were to judge me from that array what might you come up with?
Posted by: Matt | August 22, 2007 2:14 PM