Romeo + Juliet Soundtrack: 10th Anniversary Edition

It seems as though the last several years have seen a resurgence of this strange beast we know as “the ’90s.” VH-1 has told and retold the stories of its fashion, news, movies and music (see “I Love the ’90s: Parts I-IX”). 2005 saw the release of a new Hootie and the Blowfish album excruciatingly titled “Looking For Lucky” (and judging by the cover art, Lucky is presumably a dog). A healthy percentage of Americans long for the days when our president was engaging in promiscuity rather than unadulterated destruction of potential threats. Suffice to say that as this newish decade draws to a close, perhaps we are reaching for something from the past.

Capitol Records has collectively determined that the thing for which we grasp is the 1996 soundtrack for the hit film, “Romeo and Juliet.” Along with the release of a special edition DVD of the film itself, we have received a reissue of the popular soundtrack in its original form with an added five songs. As the soundtrack is boasted as a “who’s who” of ’90s rock, I was surprised to see how few of the names I recognized. Yes, it does have the song by the otherwise forgettable Cardigans that says, “Love me, love me, say that you love me” (“Lovefool”) and the sadistic Garbage song that broods “I would die for you, I would cry for you” (“#1 Crush”). But who are One Inch Punch and the Wannadies? Who is Gavin Friday? And why, oh why, did we as a nation clear for public display a band called the Butthole Surfers? Perhaps the claimed title of a “who’s who” is a bit ostentatious, though there are some shining moments.

Despite the flat, abysmal love theme (“Kissing You” by Des’ree), we are treated to a fun and lyrically appealing Everclear song (“Local God”) that not only captures some of the film’s best moments but also possesses the potential for true drink-in-the-air status and stands easily as the band’s best song. Even more impressive is the excellent Radiohead b-side, “Talk Show Host,” which is more prominent in the film than the orchestral score. The song is a serious show-stopper and fan favorite since the days of the previous year’s classic record, The Bends. Fortunately for our 10th Anniversary Edition of the soundtrack, “Talk Show Host” comes late, leaving us something to look forward to.

However, not only is this album as bad as it was upon its original 1996 release (save Radiohead and Everclear), it’s now longer. The extra five tracks are extraneous, monotonous, and worthless. The instrumental version of “Kissing You” is certainly easier on the ears without Des’ree’s painful warble but its five-minute track time leaves it feeling labored and slow. The pieces of the orchestral score are unappealing and uninteresting. Topping the whole thing off is a 2007 remix of “Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen)” by the film’s director Baz Luhrmann. If you recall the original version, you may be wondering as I was, “Why would anyone bother recreating a song as boring as this one?” The question is truly one for the ages.

This edition of the soundtrack is listed on Amazon.com as $18.98 (OMG!), and while at times I understand the value of the re-release of a DVD of a film that has worn out its welcome, I cannot imagine the value in attempting to do the same with a soundtrack like this one. The record sounds more dated than most soundtracks not because of its time period (though that plays a certain part) but because of the niche it attempts to fill. It is heavily dark with only a few bright spots for relief from its snore- and skip button-inducing run time. If you really wish to hear “Talk Show Host,” which I recommend that you do, treat yourself to the single song with an online download service for 99 cents. Otherwise, steer clear.