On Opinions
For the duration of my relatively brief adult life, I have been afraid of my opinions. I have had trouble dealing with my thoughts on scripture, economics, politics, or even recent episodes of The Office. I have never wanted to be considered an opinionated person - probably because the only model of an opinionated person I have is a flashy, loud-mouthed entertainer like Rush Limbaugh or Michael Moore.
Also, I am not a fan of conflict. I hate for people to disagree with me to the point where they might want to argue with me or even fight me. I would hate for such unnecessary tension to exist. I want to be a Christian that is open to new ideas and varying viewpoints, but at some point, this desire has turned me into a devout fence-rider, never deciding one way or another how I truly feel about important issues - religious, social, philosophical or otherwise. I have thought that to be a progressive Christian I needed to never disagree with someone; that that was somehow a part of gracious acceptance.
I do not want to be labeled, and I have always feared that my opinions would give people license to box me into a category or demographic. I do not want to be condensed into an Evangelical, or a Republican, Democrat, Hippie, or anything else just based on a few statements I may make. But, more than anything else, I do not want to be labeled as close-minded. It seems to me, that as soon as I have an opinion about something particularly touchy (gay marriage, taxes, you name it) I’ll get labeled as either a dogmatic fundamentalist or hippie-dippy relativist. I don’t want to be defined by my opinions, so for the most part, I’ve just chosen to pretend I didn’t have any.
But, no more. I have realized that I cannot let myself be defined by my opinions. My individualism is not lost because what I think might line up with Billy Graham or Karl Marx. Having opinions does not make me close-minded, as long as the motivation for those opinions is right and justified.
Sometime I run into the mistake of forming my opinions around what others think. My thoughts become nothing but an anti-opinion - an opposition for opposition’s sake. This is not genuine and gives no real attention to the actual issue. I have formed opinions just to set my worldview against my father or anyone who wears a suit, combs his hair, or has at any point belonged to Promise Keepers. The inverse has been true as well. I have agreed with rock starts, artists, writers, or anyone with a beard, just because they are a rock star, because they can paint, because they rebel by growing hair off their chin. But, I have discovered, this is not a valid way to form an opinion.
I need to also ask myself if I am making my opinion simply to justify a behavior I know is wrong. Do I agree with relativism and the absence of moral truth just to ignore conviction? Do I support the decriminalization of marijuana because I wouldn’t mind taking a hit of the Great Green Mellow Maker? The way that I form opinions is just as important as the opinions I form.
I need to ask myself: Does what I think line up with what I know of God? Does it line up with what I know of reality, the way the world actually exists? Is it MY opinion - not my pastor’s, not the author’s of the book I just read, not Thom Yorke’s, not anyone else’s. Sure, these people may influence my opinions, I may even agree wholeheartedly with them, but in the end they will be MY opinions, internalized with sincere deliberation and not thoughtless adherence. I’ll give my opinions with unashamed zeal.
But, I have asked myself, what if my opinions change? What if some new information comes along and forces me to rethink and even alter my prior convictions? Does this make me a hypocrite, or worse yet, a flip-flopper! I have decided that there can be no wrong, no hypocrisy, no flip-floppery done if I change my mind based on new information. That is the spirit of rational thought: being able to investigate the facts and truths of the world and forming your opinions around that, and it is a constant process. I used to think that at this time in my life, I would have the questions of life solved. I am realizing that I’ll most likely spend the rest of my life trying to figure it out. It seems only natural to me that my opinions will change over time as I learn and grow in the vastness of my self and the universe.
But again, I must interrogate my motivation for changing my mind. I must not change my mind for acceptance, for the sake of reactionary rebellion, or to feel “progressive.” If I learn something new about God, something new about reality, and my motivations are pure, I will not be afraid of the fresh outlook. I’ll give my new opinions with just as must enthusiasm as my last.
With so many different worldview to weigh in our present culture, with so much information available to everyone, it is crucial for the Christian community not to become a philosophical cloister and stand away from the discussion with ready-made answers handed down and recycled without a thought. (I am not saying that this necessarily the case in the church, but it is a danger that accompanies tradition) There must be conversation happening. But, what good is a conversation if no one has a stance, or if one person speaks and the other nods in “compassionate” agreement? Yes, it is absolutely necessary that I am eager and ready to listen, but I also must not be afraid to speak.
Posted on February 11, 2008 12:00 AM
Comments
Great article, Michael. It's funny I read this today, when a few hours ago I was highly anxious about a course I'm taking that involves active discussion. Needless to say, I'm not an active participator and feel much more comfortable listening to others speak. But of course, the professor frowns on passive students.
I'm happy I stumbled upon this article that lets me know I'm not the only one struggling to voice my thoughts.
Posted by: Christina | February 11, 2008 2:40 PM
I love thoughtful pieces like this.
I, too, have wrestled with these problems in different ways. I have found the most comfort in having opinions in areas I feel informed, but not in making my opinion my identity. As you note, if willing to listen, we are constantly offered new information that we must sift through to discern its value.
In general, I think our biggest problem as a society is that we want to see too many issues in black and white--a separate and endless discussion that this piece moves well beyond. If our population could even get to the point Michael gets to, we would be much better off.
To address your piece directly, I have some of the same misgivings. There are areas where I have confidence in my opinion, but at the same time am willing to let it evolve. I have no qualms with that, but rather with what those who know my opinions will think if I get an opportunity to demonstrate how my beliefs have changed.
I find that in my mental picture of friends and acquaintances I categorize them by details - which are often their opinions. (Politics, religion, sports, movies, writing, etc.) We normally use these details immediately to find common ground and engage one another. Because I remember others this way it bothers me that when my opinions change, someone I have shared a rather defining opinion with now has an outdated view of who I am.
As one example, I've become more liberal over the last few years of my life, but 95% of the people I've met in my life would have no idea. I envision them thinking of me through this election process and having a good laugh about what a die-hard conservative they remember me as.
Fortunately, no matter how uncomfortable those thoughts are, I can think of no better option than seeking the truth. There is nothing that I have learned that I wish I hadn't. I'm much more comfortable learning of my ignorance than I am with the stupid things I've said and done because I thought I was "right." I think (worthy) confidence can exist concurrently with open-mindedness.
Posted by: Aaron L. | February 11, 2008 5:16 PM
I forgot to say this was very well-written.
Posted by: Aaron L. | February 11, 2008 5:18 PM
This is such a well put article and really resonates with me. I used to deal with this same issue. It was a great realization for me when I saw that I had been abandoning truth because of this fear of being seen as dogmatic. Even though I sometimes still struggle with this I try and reside in the humility of God's word.
Posted by: Caleb | February 12, 2008 8:08 AM
This is definitly touching on something that I am struggling with internally at this moment. One trusted authority I confide in has some well-reasoned difinitive answers that aren't always pleasant to hear, but make complete sense, while others I talk to, books I read, etc. suggest this "gracious acceptence" or "conversation" about all the other ideas under the sun. I am easily influenced by all of these factors, so where does this leave me? On the fence, every time. Time to do my homework and form my own opinions.
Posted by: Steve Reeves | February 12, 2008 8:26 AM
Does what I think line up with what I know of God? I think that is the perfect question. As we know more about God our opinions will change to reflect that.
Sadly we cant avoid labels, Bono will always be a liberal to some. I cant believe that most conservatives dont care about the poor, just as I doubt all "liberals" who are Christian view scripture as fluid. I love God and His word, I like the foundational, solid aspect of it, it is secure. I like that it teaches me to be a good steward of God's planet, (liberal) as well as teaching me where sexuality is healthy and appropriate. (conservative) Gods word also teaches me that laughter is good and that love is best and those things are transcendant. I try to follow this idea, use things, love people.
Good article, thanks for the provocation of thought.
Posted by: Jed Hummell | February 12, 2008 9:20 AM
Great article, a moving meditaion.
I think the first step in forming a valid opinion is listening to others. We should always be willing to re-evaluate the beliefs we hold most dear in light of our ever deepening encounter with the living Christ and the Tradition of the Church, laid out in Scripture but also in the writings of others who struggled to know God their whole lives.
The saying of the Jewish mystic Sage Ben Zoma applies here:
"Eizeh hu hakham? Halomed mikol adam (who is wise? the one who learns from all people)."
Posted by: Guy Barnhart | February 13, 2008 6:08 PM
It was almost scary how identical my life is to what you wrote. I too am often afraid of my own opinions, for fear of offending someone. I also seem however to always be playing Devil's advocate whenever I make my opinions known. Plus I also find myself trusting rock stars and movies more than "voices from the church" because those rock stars and movies seem more genuine and more honest. I really appreciate your speaking out. You wrote things that will definately make me begin to think.
Posted by: MLSTweet | February 14, 2008 11:14 AM
Michael Dallas Miller!!!
Dude, I am so impressed by what I'm reading here, I had to show Jeremy...he was impressed too! So proud of the burley bearded man you've become.
I've always been one to question EVERYTHING. I appreciate your authenticity here as you wrestle through your faith and more. You're right...your opinions will change many times before you're thirty.
Keep up the good writing...and stay away from the Great Green Mellow Maker!
Love ya man! Jenny Green
Posted by: Jenny Green | February 15, 2008 10:10 PM
a lot of people will stress the importance of preserving the freedom to maintain one's own opinion... conflict arises when you start to actually affect the opinion of others. Is it okay to want to change other people's opinions? how else, after all, will the world change if people's opinions are not changed?
Posted by: patrick | March 9, 2008 8:40 AM